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Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart...Dear Mrs. Harris,Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are “documented by our video surveillance cameras”:1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, ‘Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned. They had lunch with him in the executive lounge, and showed him to his very well-appointed corner office (which did double as a meeting room for the highest level veeps most of the time since Ryan was likely to only make an appearance there once or twice a month). He enjoyed them, as well as all the attention from the very important people in his dad’s company who now needed to include him in some of their dealings.While Ryan was out of the house pretending to be a corporate executive for the day, his friends had other responsibilities. The new pool service that Kerri was supposed to orient yesterday had had a scheduling conflict, and asked to come this afternoon, and she had nearly forgotten. She and Matt had woken up around 10 am, had sex, and gone back to sleep, and would have still been in bed except that Jenna came looking for Matt and woke them. Jenna told Matt to get cleaned up and grab some lunch, because she wanted him to go with her this afternoon. They were meeting with an.
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