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Nurses come to tend me daily, check my monitors, remove my wastes. I have a wheelchair, I can go anywhere inside my room. I have this computer and another should this one fail. Oddly, I sometimes have erections, this happens when the nurse washes me. I have no control, I have no feeling of when that happens, but I can look down and see it. As time went on, to keep from becoming insane, I allow others to be me. They are inside me,they come and go. I have them all under control most of the time, but sometimes one bad one comes out. I emailed back to just a few, some pretending, some real. I am lying, only one was real. I am trying to tell truth here. I am Dan. Inside me is many Dans. They are all different. Dana comes sometimes and she takes control, she can be a bitch, trying to run everything all the time. I get rid of her, it takes effort. I am Dan. It is difficult to be a woman. Dan doesn’t like that. But sometimes I am her, I feel her pain. I wish, oh I wish I was just Dan all the. As it was, we picked out a lovely skirt andblouse. Then we went to more boutiques. By the time we were finished, Ihad two more skirts, two tops and a dress. Then we shopped for shoesand, Kenneth insisted on a new pocket book. Everything coordinates, soI can mix and match to make a wardrobe. I never paid much attention toputting outfits together. I just saw something I liked and bought it.Kenneth has such a good eye for colors and styles. I would never havebeen able to do it without him, especially because all of his friendsinsisted on giving us big discounts, so I just about doubled mybudget." Beth and I listened in fascination to Mom's account of her day." Go on, Mom," encouraged Beth, "what about the night?" Well," Mom continued, "like I told Jenny on the phone, we didn't stopfor lunch, so when we finished shopping, Kenneth asked me if I wouldlike to have dinner with him. We went to this charming Italianrestaurant and had the most delicious meal. I really didn't want todrink, but.
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