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And he treated me like I was the most important thing in his life. His first deployment after we got married lasted about six months and it was agony. Ben’s enlistment was winding down, and his next deployment, as I said, was supposed to be his last. And it was, I guess. If you had thrust your hand into my chest by brute force and just ripped my heart out, that would have hurt less than what I felt when I learned Ben was gone. All of a sudden, I was a twenty-five-year-old widow. For weeks I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Even now at times and without warning my chest will tighten, my lungs stop working, and the enormous hole inside me overwhelms everything. So here I am, alone in a queen-sized bed made for two. I have my blankets on (and nothing else), and like Ishmael, I feel warm on this cold night. But that doesn’t cancel out the aching emptiness that never seems to leave me anymore. I have stacked up three or four pillows so I’m kind of sitting up. Thinking maybe it’s time to. “It feels so real.”“And the center?” Doc asked.“I could only feel that there was a mystique that permeated what you saw and that you were unable to put into words. Perhaps the shadow of multiple futures played out before your eyes,” William continued. “Therefore, I have chosen for the figures at the center of the rostrum, not the lovers that you thought you saw, but a Pieta—weeping Madonna with her crucified son. The positioning is the same as Michelangelo’s famous work, but the figures are those of Wesley and Rebecca. The motto flourish beneath is in New Testament Greek.”“Greater love hath no man,” Doc translated. He paused to polish his glasses with a handkerchief. They had inexplicably steamed over. He noticed that Margaret was dabbing at her glasses with a napkin as well. “It does embody the spirit of it all.”“Are my eyes playing tricks on me?” asked Margaret. “It’s a little hard to tell with tears in them. It seems like there is a shadow brooding in the background?”“Out of.
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