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One of the more entertaining bar endeavors that I partook in involved doing karaoke covers of popular rap songs from the early 1990’s. It was quite stimulating to flow over Digital Underground beats from “The Humpty Dance” or Tone Lōc’s “Funky Cold Medina” with a bar full of Hoosiers bobbing their heads to the rhythm of the music. After one of my more theatrical performances of “The Humpty Dance” (complete with three drunk chicks behind me chanting “do me, baby” during the chorus), the bar MC summarized my exhibition by announcing over the speaker system, “He’s really white but I’m telling you, that guy’s got soul!” Toward the end of the summer, I became a barroom regular where I often rapped karaoke jingles for the drunken hoards of Indiana natives. I typically received standing ovations, complete with hoots and hollers, for my stunning wigger demonstrations. Little did I realize at the time, my karaoke gigs garnered the attention of several wanton housewives. It was fun, don’t you think?’ ‘Very fun. I am going to miss this town.’ ‘Well, you certainly had enough chances to do things, this summer.’ there was a slight note of dissapproval in her voice. ‘Guilty as charged. All during last year at college, I wished I was back here, doing all sorts of things…and then when I do come back, I turn into a prototypical loser twenty year old. But at least I did one good thing this summer. ‘What’s that?’ she said, knowing the answer. ‘Finally got together with you.’ I had known Carrie for years, and had a crush on her at times. When I went away to college, I had put aside thoughts of relationship with her, since she was still in high school at the time. But this summer, when I realized that she would soon be going to college, I started to treat her as an adult love interest, and we had gotten together at the start of the summer, and admitted to each other that we had both thought about it for years. This had also given me my first real sexual.
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