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The world is just getting too complex for me.They even mess me up every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle on something themselves but this sudden “Paper or Plastic?” every time I check out just knocks me for a loop.I bought some of those cloth reusable bags to avoid looking confused, but I never remember to take them with me.Now I toss it back to them. When they ask me, “Paper or Plastic?” I just say, “Doesn’t matter to me. I am bi-sacksual.” Then it’s their turn to stare at me with a blank look.I was recently asked if I tweet.I answered, “No, but I do fart a lot.”P.S. I know some of you are not over 60.I sent it to you to allow you to forward it to those who are.We senior citizens don’t need anymore gadgets.The TV remote and the garage door remote are about all we can handle.Garage DoorThe boss walked into the office one morning not knowing his zipper was down and his fly area wide open. His assistant walked up to him and said, ‘This morning when you. ”She gave me what I thought might be an alarmed look and asked “What do you mean you are going to miss this?”I told her what Jason had said about using me more at the parts place.“We will find away. I’m not near enough ready to give you up yet.”“But you are going to give me up. You’ve already told me I’m only your toy until your divorce is final. It’s just going to happen sooner than you expected.”“You don’t sound like you are taking it too hard.”“Don’t believe that for even a second. I’m living every young guys dream I’ve got a smoking hot older woman doing her best to fuck my brains out and I’m loving it, but don’t forget you told me why you were doing me and how long it was likely to last. I’ve always known it was going to end so I’m somewhat prepared for it.”“Well I’m not ready to let it go. I’ll think of something. I’m still needing. You got one more in you?”I did. The ‘one more’ made me late for dinner, but mom had put aside a plate for me and all I needed to do was put it in.
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