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) The attendant gave me two quick piercings in each ear-the whole thing was surprisingly painless-and gave me instructions on how to insert the studs and keep the holes from becoming infected. I was just about to get up from the chair when I noticed a nearby case containing a large selection of belly rings."Oh, look!" I exclaimed involuntarily. I couldn't help myself-they all looked so pretty and feminine.Margaret gave me a dour expression. "You're not serious." Why not?" I said. "I've always wondered what one of those would feellike." Always?" she asked skeptically."Sure," I said, trying to figure out a way to phrase things properly for the attendant. "Anyway, ever since the day I looked in the mirror and saw that I'd become a woman." You certainly have the figure for it," chimed in the attendant. She was trying to make a sale, obviously, but I was grateful for the compliment all the same.Margaret sighed. "Well, in for a penny, in for a pound, I guess. Let's get your belly button. I cleaned my upper lip with a napkin and stared at my wife. "What the hell kind of question is that?" I demanded. I learned a long time ago that the best defense is a good offense. Twenty years ago I was quite proud of the little guy, but he seemed less impressive all the time. "You know how we ladies sit around the clubhouse and have a couple drinks after our golf league on Wednesdays? Last night the discussion got around to our husband's cocks and how long they were. Most of us had no idea how long our husband's cocks were. I mean we know how long they are, but not the actual measurement," admitted Patti. "It just made me wonder how long, in inches, your cock is." I didn't just fall off a load of turnips. I have heard how a group of women can be more coarse and crude than a bunch of guys. I also knew they would be more honest. Men expect other men to lie. We all do it and accept it. It makes us all feel better about ourselves, and our place in the cosmic plan. We lie about the fish.
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