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It’s more like a second, secret girlfriend. Why?”“I think I need a mistress.”“Excuse me?” I said, astonished.“I think that’s what I need, a second girlfriend.”“You need another girlfriend?” We had met a pretty brunette after school holding his hand, but we doubted he had gotten anywhere past the hand-holding stage. Now he was looking for another?I looked over at Kelly who was just shaking her head. “He’s the reincarnation of your brother,” she muttered. To Seamus, she said, “And that’s not a good thing!”“Where did you come up with this brainstorm?” I asked.“Seamus, this is dumb, even for you!” added Riley.“I found on the web a formula for figuring out the perfect age of a mistress,” he said.“You found a formula? Why don’t you tell your mother? You know, the professor of mathematics?”He looked at his mother and said, “The guy takes his age and divides it by two, and then adds seven. I just turned fourteen, so if I divide by two, I get seven, and then add seven I get back to fourteen.. Split everything, “Imm dimm thmmm fo myfellllff.”“No way, my friend. Who did this to you?”“Gommmm awmymm,” Edi mumbled while becoming excited and thrashing around, obviously trying to wave the deputy away.The nurse moved closer. “I’m sorry, Deputy,” the pretty young redhead said. “I told the doctor that the patient did not want to talk to the police and had refused in the emergency room last night. It was signed off on by the emergency room doctor as well as the nurse, but Dr. Jefferson, who is the hospitalist now in charge of the case, insisted that you be called, anyway. I’m sorry, but my first responsibility is to my patient. I’m going to have to ask you to leave. If he should want to speak to you, I’ll give you a call.”The deputy put his card on the bedside table and walked out with the nurse. “Did he say anything to the emergency room people about who did this to him?”The nurse just shrugged. “I don’t know, but he maintains that he did it to himself. I suppose that’s possible,.
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