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He had given two loads while taking four or five through a glory hole. I had taken three and shot two. Now home I followed my mom into the kitchen and there behind a wine bottle and a glass sat the last female in the world that I wanted to see at the time. It was Donna Jean from next door my lifelong flame—or at least since 2 nd grade. I became aware of girls and love at a young age. My mother was a huge soap opera fan and then would watch “Afternoon Delights,” the romance movies on local television. On bad weather afternoons I would sit on the couch with her and be spellbinded by the interactions between men and women. We’re talking about age 8. I identified with the men and yearned for the women. I’d say I was normal then, except that most boys my age were interested in anything but girls. I could tell you who all the pretty girls were at school and I fantasized about kissing most of them. That was before I learned about other things you could do. And in those days you weren’t. George used drugs since college and he gradually started using more exotic designer drugs until his behavior become more and more erratic. We had not had sex for the past 6 or 7 years. George told me that I was the worst woman in bed that he had ever had. One night about 5 years ago, George brought home a black man who he said was a business acquaintance. I went to bed and George followed me into the bedroom. He pushed me on the bed and ripped my clothes off and tied me to the bed. He had apparently been planning this, because he had ropes hidden under the bed. He called the black man into the room and he forced me to perform oral sex on him and he raped me several times that night. George kept urging him on and telling him to teach me how to be a real woman. In the morning George released me and told me that he hoped that I was pregnant with a black baby. I tried to commit suicide but I didn't have the guts to go through with it. After George left for the office, I called some.
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