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I say stupid rather than ignorant, because I was not ignorant of the fact that all girls eventually start exploring their sexuality. They get curious, and they’re often self-conscious. A lot of them have body image issues. They want to be noticed as a female, and yet that terrifies them. They want to try things, but are scared to. I’m fully aware about all the angst involved with puppy love and broken hearts and crushes and all that stuff that’s completely normal. It’s how the vast majority of girls claw and tear their way into womanhood.I just don’t think I thought about Chastity doing any of that stuff. I think it was a can’t-see-the-forest-for-the-trees situation.Well, I couldn’t see the forest until I smacked into a tree, anyway.And Chas had access to men that the average girl doesn’t have. By the time she was fourteen and fifteen, she was on a first name basis with a couple hundred men, who she saw at the range all the time. And they were men of varying ages and experience, too,. I think she's getting into the idea of the threesome. Why do I want that to happen? Why do I encourage her to sleep with Charles? Why doesn't it bother me that they both enjoy sex together? Somehow, I made a transformation of attitude and I like it better. We'll both do fine with Charles since we've both had practice. How will we do with each other?Charles is unhappy being at home with nothing important to do except work out and make his own meals. He was even going to cook for me yesterday and then he took me out for a semi-expensive delicious dinner. We both want to go to graduate school and we'll have to work out the arrangements.Stopped at a light, I checked my makeup in the mirror. Then, I smiled and felt content with my life. The guy behind me honked impatiently. I was so deep in thought that I missed the light turning green. Pay attention. Last year at this time, I was struggling and arguing with Blair. What a mistake he was. I never felt about him like I feel about Charles..
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