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"My wife might be impressed if I say I had communion, she thinks all we do is miss easy spares and buy pitchers of beer."And that is how I, with Presbyterian background and Scottish blood, went to a Catholic funeral several hours before Hal and I were scheduled to bowl in doubles and singles events.Hal and I sat together, not in suits, but adequately dressed. I was impressed when the priest said "The Our Father uses debtors and the ending is not the longer one many Protestants use." I did feel at ease in this Catholic church, felt sad that a husband and children, sister, and other family members had lost someone I sensed had led a good life. I guess taking communion was important to my bowling friend, and I certainly appreciated his getting me to relax in a Catholic church. I "passed the peace" of course with Hal, but also strangers sitting near us.After communion, several hymns, and readings from the Bible, relatives filed out first, and first Janet's husband and children passed me,. “Everyone has left and gone to lunch,” she said. “Do you want to leave and come back?” “No,” I replied, “I can wait.” She silently stepped towards where I was seated at the conference room table. As she did, she silently unbuttoned her button-down shirt, allowing it to part. “There’s no one here,” she whispered as she approached where I was seated, allowing her shirt to part. Her 38DD's were neatly tucked into a white brassiere. I was speechless. I didn’t know what to say. I was on a professional business call that looked like it was fixing to turn into a booty call. I stretched out my legs and rested my heels on the carpeted floor of the conference room as she silently stepped between my legs, peering down at me, as she bit down on her lower lip. She pressed her knee gently against my crotch and leaned forward, placing her hands on my shoulders, her long curly hair hanging down over her shoulders. Her breasts, barely containable in her push up bra, were practically right in my.
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