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Underlying all of this during the same time period was a persistent interest and obsession with pornography. Over time I could tell that I loved any story that had to do with taboo and power. Increasingly, I found that I was really drawn to the interracial stories where the black man was powerful and the white man or woman was submissive. I think it was cathartic and relaxing to fantasize about stopping the stressful and racist competition with black guys. All of this laid a foundation of being tired of trying to be an alpha male, increasing interest in interracial domination, and an increasing interest in sex as a place to act out forbidden fantasies. Then during college a work environment developed that was unbelievable when I think back on it. I still can't believe what was happening there and I can't believe it wasn't obvious to me where it was going. When I went to work at a restaurant to be a fry cook, the manager warned me about "Darrel," an older black man who was also a cook. Sir... sir... sir..."Rod's tongue licked wetly and eagerly her bare upper pubic mound, his hands cupping her buttocks and pulling her against his mouth. He was saying, "Delicious... so smooth and warm... so nice to lick here. Do you like us, Lucy? As friends?" Yes, sir, yes."For several minutes they hugged and kissed her, wetting her body with their saliva and stimulating her wildly.Bob asked, "Lucy, is it all right if I take off my pants? It's so awkward to hug you with my pants on."Lucy panicked and looked at Helen. Were they trying to get naked? Were things going too far?Helen realized her anxiety. She said, "Rod, Bob. Please give the poor girl a bit of rest. Come, let's sit down and chat."Reluctantly the men released Lucy. She noticed the prominent bulges of the pants of the two men. They all separated and sat down in the sofas. Helen sat between Rod and Bob in one sofa. Lucy sat in the other. They poured more wine and started sipping as they chatted.The two men kept looking at.
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