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I pulled acontainer of fruit juice I had forgotten about out of my desk drawer andsettled back to read what appeared to be a very lengthy message...From: (Sender Unknown)To: Jeff Bradshaw, Aldeberan NetwareSubj: Your Best FriendJeff, I know you're going to think I'm nuts, but I'm not. Even though you'veprobably never heard of me I'm - or at least I was - Andy Skinner, your bestfriend. Now before you press the delete key figuring you've got some sort ofloony writing you, hear me out. It's sort of complicated.Remember back in Topeka and you were a kid? Remember the Skinners nextdoor - or at least I hope they moved in next door. They probably didn't haveany kids as you remember, but they did have one - me. They didn't want me;they never wanted kids, but accidents do happen and mom wasn't the sort tosubmit to an abortion, being Catholic and all. The result was me.By the time we moved in next door to you, I was twelve years old. I hadn'texactly had the happiest childhood in the. With that abrupt motion the glasses started to skitter erratically. One crashed to the floor, most of it exploding into a collection of long, even shards on impact. Wow, I thought, real crystal, not cheap glass. A few ounces of Chardonnay splattered across the tile floor and several people, trying to keep the spreading liquid off their feet, hopped around in surprise. One of these was a portly gentleman with a handlebar mustache who ended up staggering back into a pretentious oil monstrosity that looked like something Monet might have vomited up after an acute absinthe bender. I made grabs at the other glasses, trying to keep at least of few them from joining their unfortunate vanguard. It worked to some extent, but the situation still became pretty unpleasant. Handlebar and the waiter ended up yelling expletives at each other and the floor was a mess, random puddles of various wines and liqueurs scattered about in semi-random fashion, punctuated by chunks of shining crystal in.
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