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He was put on a plane in Japan and returned to the United States to attend her funeral and to see to the welfare of his new daughter. A month later, he received a hardship discharge from the Navy and he settled down in Rexville to care for me permanently.He rented a small apartment and took a job as a carpenter and part-time roofer. With help from a sweet, elderly woman, a retired school teacher, who lived in an apartment above us, he raised me and worked to give me the best possible life.My father and I were very close. He dated but I only rarely met the women he saw,. From what he told me, he had no plans to remarry. He later bought a small two bedroom house where we would live right up until his death sixteen months ago.It was his death that put me on the road with destiny. With my grandfather having died a year earlier, I had no living relatives. I was fifteen years old, a ward of the state, and living in a group home. A group home is the modern day, politically correct word for. " Mymouth dry. "Yes, Emma. Yes I think it may be necessary. But I think you will realisewhat you are and what you want in the following days as we enjoy ourselves." We drove in silence most of the way back, her hand at times on my thigh.I felt ashamed that I wanted her to touch more of me. My body ached for release.Only gradually did I relax in my shame. I caught myself moving my fingers onmy left hand as if the play with my rings but they weren't there. I had giventhem up. Thought of this strange relationship, of how I needed it. My onlyregret was that I was having an extra marital affair. What she did to me, whatshe made me do, I knew I secretly wanted. I looked at my knickers at my knees. It might seem bizarre to some but people smoked, drank, took drugs, did allsorts of things that they knew were dangerous. God even driving in the carwas dangerous. What I wanted from this wasn't too bad. My stomach tightenedinside and I squirmed my buttocks on the seat. Thought of her punishing.
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