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Anyway, to cut a long story short, I phoned the AA and they could not fix it and suggested towing it to the local garage from whom she purchased it but as it was Sunday, she would have to wait till tomorrow to do anything.‘Now what am I going to do, I can’t lug all this shopping on the bus’.‘Don’t fret, I’ll give you lift home and then you can get a taxi tomorrow to the garage. By the way my name is Donald and you are?’‘Edna’‘Well pleased to meet you’.Getting herself settled, I noticed that she dressed quite modern with a skirt that came above the knee and rucked up as she sat down, showing a hint of stocking top. I could not stop looking and she caught me doing so.‘So, you’re a leg man? I must say getting attention from one so young is a lovely compliment’.I was surprised at her directness and then said, ‘Yes I also liked the look of your crinkly fat thighs when you were sitting in your car’. ‘Oh that, I’m always doing it, to see if anyone notices. Because at my age nobody is. The only reason Santa flies around in the sleigh is because Mrs. Claus needs sleep after working the entire year for this one night. She makes him do it and he probably whines the whole time.” I counter. Then in my best mock whining voice I continue “It’s coooold, it’s snowinggg, where’s the hot chocolate, my coat is too tight, I need a naaap! Seriously? The reindeer do all the real work.” “Maybe, but when’s the last time you had 200 kids sit on your lap and tell you they want an iPad?” “Oh my God, really? You’re going to try that argument? Every night you beg me to sit on your lap and bounce up and down for an hour and now when a thirty pound kid wants a picture with Santa you complain. I weigh a lot more than most kids.” suddenly stopping “Don’t say it. I know what you’re thinking, just don’t say it, I do not have a fat ass.” “Well, in my world Santa rules the North Pole and all the sexy little elven women work in stockings, bras and panties. It’s really a very nice place to.
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