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‘I love you and I want you so bad that it hurts, but we don’t have to tonight. We can wait, get used to each other.’ I slid over close to her, took her hand and kissed it, looked in her eyes and hoped, but for what I didnt know. ‘I’m scared, I don’t know what to do, What will you think of me? Hold me, please, hold me and kiss me.’ And I did, untiing and removing her peignoir, I slipped in next to her, she rolled over against me, nuzzling up into my armpit and burying her face in my shoulder. ‘What if I’m not any good? Have you had any other women, what if they were better? What will you think of me, why do you want me?’ She was almost crying, and I was lost. ‘I want you because I love you, I want you to love me and want me. You’re important to me, I’m scared too, that I won’t make you happy. That tomorrow you’ll chase me away.’ ‘But I won’t. I couldn’t. Im not going to wait. I want you now – tonight!’ I said nothing to that, there was nothing to say, so (she had been cuddled up. I wish this traffic would move.My cell rings. The caller ID says Lisa.I answer "Hi Lisa" Scarlett! We have got to go out tonight" she says with her always bubbly attitude."Oh, I dunno... I just had a really bad day at work. I just got fired." You hated that job anyway! Come on, at least we can get some cute guys to buy us drinks!"I reluctantly agree, a little fun could be good for me. "Okay Lisa, meet me at my place at 9." As I hang up, the traffic starts moving and the warm breeze flutters through my hair. Maybe things are looking up.I find a parking spot a couple blocks from my apartment. Its an old 3 story brownstone with walls as thick as paper. My apartment is a small one bedroom, one bath on the second story. Its not a dump, just small and old. As I open the door, my cat fluffy answers the door.I cook myself some Ramen Noodles for dinner. I'm really not that hungry.I turn the hot water knob on the shower. It takes a minute to warm up. I wander back to the bedroom, kicking off.
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