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” She was dry humping me through her jeans at this point. She couldn’t control herself. Fuck. “I know this is is a lot to process but…”And then I lost it. I didn’t want to hear her anymore. I pulled her face to mine and kissed her on the mouth. She let out a deep moan. I had no idea what I was doing. Despite everything being said, she had succeeded in making me feel the same intense desire she was, and I didn’t have the strength to resist.Her hands went to my back and pulled me into an even tighter embrace. We kissed like our mouths couldn’t get enough of each other. I could hardly breath. It took my mom… it took Laura about five seconds to to start biting my lips a little. And then she had her tongue licking the roof of my mouth. I had hardly made out with anyone by this point, and I never knew someone could make these kinds of sensations happen with simple kissing. She was tearing at my shirt from the back so I decided to help her out. I stopped kissing her for a moment and as I. “Look, if I said it is possible to walk across the river, you’d say it is impossible. If you put your mind to it, it is entirely possible. Look, I’ll go first, then you two follow.”Jesus steps off the bank and walks across the river, barely getting much more than the soles of his sandals wet.Trump and Putin look at each other in amazement.Then Vladamir says “Vell, I’ll go next. See you on ze other zide.” He steps off the bank and strides across the river, the water only sloshing around his ankles.Donald looks on in amazement, then decides ‘Well, if they can do it, I can too.’ He steps out onto the river, takes two steps, then plunges into the water, and is carried, cartwheeling, out of sight down the river.Jesus looks at Vladamir and remarks “Well, obviously Mr Trump didn’t know about the stepping stones.”Vladamir looks at Jesus, perplexed. “Vhat stones?!”A Trump supporter dies, and finds himself at the Pearly Gates, facing St Peter. After going through the entrance formalities, St.
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