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I had cut him off from any sex with me during that week but had told him that he could get lucky as soon as I had my own revenge over his indiscretion.The Saturday after the night that I had bedded Frank, I had called Nicole after Frank left and arranged to go shopping with her. It was an unguarded conversation and I told her how much I appreciated her efforts on my behalf. I was in such a good mood over my victory that I asked her if she thought she could 'get' Simon again since I had enjoyed myself. Although there was nobody else on my horizon, I thought I might want the chance to explore future opportunities.Frank's love-making had been less than adequate but I was still elated over the fact that I had been able to totally fool Simon through my plan. With Nicole's and my connivance, Simon still thought that he had strayed first.When I came home from shopping, he wanted to talk to me. I was slightly belligerent and threw back in his face that he had been the first to cheat while I. .. BDSM at the SM Studio became routine instead of joy and relaxation. Routine made me incautious and when having sex with one of my regular customers, I got pregnant... But for me a c***d must be born out of love, so I didn't want to have that baby! However, abortion went totally wrong and I became infertile :-(I was really depressed about that. Evert-Jan and Lindsay were there for me, to support me, comfort me, but they couldn't help me. I wanted to have a family, like my parents. The dream was gone... At some point I decided to quit the SM Studio period in my life. When I therefore was harassed by frustrated former customers, my limit was reached... One day I made a suicide attempt :-( Again thanks to Evert-Jan and Lindsay their love and care for me, I failed on that one…After I tried to commit suicide, I was hospitalized for over half a year. And not a normal hospital, but the type of hospital where you were tied up and d**gged 24 hours a day... Lindsay and Evert-Jan were shocked.
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