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“You and Sally are the greatest coaches, thank you so much!” I said squeezing him. “Ok, Ok, kiddo, now let me go towel myself down.” He said.I stood there and must have been beaming, completely unaware of myself in the skimpy little bikini. As Matt took a step back I saw him look me up and down and that look changed my life. It was the first look I ever remember getting as a sexual being, as a woman. And that Matt had been the one to look me over gave me a tingle I’d never felt before. Years of his respect and kindness made that glance at my body feel good and appropriate, not immature and clumsy as it felt like when the guys on the team did it. I felt my nipples harden and a pulse of energy rush into my crotch like I’d never felt before. In fact I’d never even masturbated before that time. I’d started menstruating a year earlier, but hadn’t really figured out that I could pay myself some attention down there. I wondered if the ‘once over’ was nothing, or if Matt might have really. I’ve also restarted some of my magickal practices. It suits me and I find comfort in it. The reason I mention this is I wear for magickal reasons a bracelet. I was wearing it last night. Call it further delirium, or what you will, but I called out to it mentally and was instantly oriented. I was still on the carpet ride and absolutely terrified, but I was anchored.Eventually, I fell back to sleep. Only to have dreams where people were talking to me and I couldn’t understand them. Their voice sounded like several over laid tracks saying the same thing yet, with a watery quality. Everything else was normal. I could almost make out some of the words but not quite.-scene change-My wife and I were at some type of modern monastery doing some type of retreat and we were waiting our turn to enter our individual or joint cells that point was unclear and a guide was opening and closing the door that led to that hallway. Someone had hand written the spiritual exercises on the wall. I was.
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