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My best guess is that we can do it in 56 days, getting everyone home before August First.”“Wow,” most of everyone else said.“When would we have to leave to make that promise?” I asked.“The first Thursday in June,” was his very confident answer.“Could I see the details please?” I asked. He handed me a printout. He had copies, good boy, Dad!“Good job of getting multiple days in the big cities Brian,” I said at first glance.“Where are we performing more than once?” Jennie asked.“Three days each in Chicago, Salt Lake City, and Indianapolis. Eight other cities we are performing at twice.”“From what I’m looking at, this is a really well-planned Tour. Good job, Dad. Any stipulations?”“Most places would like one of your impersonations. You’ve got a following. I’ve turned down requests for One-man shows, mostly because of school.”“You are kidding?”“Nope, and it was great money they were offering.”“How great are you talking, old man?”“Anywhere from $25,000 to $100,000 for an hour show.”“After. Then heleans forward ever so slightly and strokes the wide lapel of hispinstriped jacket. "Wives who have brought their men into line, to saythe least, by giving them -- " He obviously relishes these hesitations.His voice lowers just slightly. " -- penis reductions," he concludes,somewhere between shocked and interested. He licks his lips. "And thefirst of those wives is Mandy. No last names please," he finishes,using one of his catchphrases.The camera swings to his left to reveal to the home viewers a strikingyoung woman in a slinky red dress. She says, "Hello, Sammy. I'm soglad to be here tonight to talk about... well... what I had to have doneto my hubby Glen."Camera back on Sammy. His eyebrows go up. "You said it was what youHAD to have done, referring to having his penis trimmed down. Do youmean that it's HIS fault that you did it. That he drove you to whatsome might call an extreme measure?" Definitely, it's Glen's fault. I mean he was always pestering me.
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