Me: I don’t know about bad boys, but I do have a big toy!Eve: Mmmmm. I can see that.I’m not sure if it’s a good idea to do this. This would be cheating on Chloe.Eve: Why are you so tense?Me: I have my reasons.Eve: Don’t you like me? I’m much better than Chloe, I have a lot more experience. I can do things.Me: I don’t think this is a good idea, you said it, gossip spreads like wildfire.Eve: I won’t tell if you won’t. It could be our dirty little secret. Let’s start slow. Feel my breasts, see how they fit your hand. Try the product before you buy it and all that. I won’t stop you.Me: They do look good.Eve: They feel and taste better!Me: Mmmmm.I was in a dilemma. The way she talks, it made me really horny. And my dick was rock hard as Eve’s hand was still on my tool. The devil inside me wanted to have fun. I was touching and pressing her left boob. They were huge. Definitely 38 size. I couldn’t resist those huge melonsEve: How does it feel?Me: So far so good!Eve: Would be better without. "I smiled to myself and thought, "Lead me not into temptation. I know the way myself."Despite that sometimes-delicious pull into the last taboo, we continued to be comfortable about each other. As long periods of silence are comfortable among close friends, we had no feeling of malaise around our unresolved passions. We were, both of us I think, content in following the thread of our lives and our connection, not knowing where it would take us.There was a time, both before and again later, when I practiced a studied imperturbability, a coolness on the surface that frequently gave the lie to the cauldron beneath. I certainly didn't suffer from alexithymia... that failure to recognize feelings when I had them. To the contrary, I was in heightened contact with my feelings. As a safe cracker might have sanded his fingertips, my emotional awareness was crackling with sensitivity. What I didn't know was how to really talk about them... my feelings. Jean always helped me out when I was stuck.
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