I tell them about the knife-catcher; he would say, around the bowie knife, "What!? And give up show business!" "But I like girls. I'm not so far over the hill that I've coasted to a stop. They needed somebody to introduce the girls, and stall until the next act is ready, and they asked me. I had one question, 'Do I get free backstage passes?' They told me, 'It's up to the girls to accept any passes.'"I can tell by the tom-tom of finger tappin' and the dancin' of foot-shuffles it's time to start the show. So before the war woops begin, I'd like to introduce the opening act." He turned his upper body around, "Can I introduce the openin' act?!"He looked at whoever was waiting in the wing, then, turning himself back around, said to the audience, "Openin' acts are for those at the bottom rung in billin', if they get any billin' at all. So don't blame me for what's about to come out." And he stepped backwards as he gestured towards stage left, "Presentin', 'Salome, and Her Dance of the. Repeat. Though I’m physically charged almost every waking minute, I’m mentally drained. So much so, that it took several visits to Ethan’s before it actually occurred to me that I was cheating on Jess. What Ethan and I do feels so different, so other that I actively didn’t realize that I’m being unfaithful for an embarrassingly long time. When it hits me, I feel terrible. Jess is an amazing woman and I’m the one who pushed to be exclusive with her. She’s a wild girl at heart and I’ve tried to tame her, only to screw around behind her back. Guilt gnaws at me and I’m finding it harder and harder to know how to act around her. I go through phases where I dote on her and initiate constantly, trying to make up for what I’m doing to her, and then phases where I don’t.Should I be sleeping with her when I’m thinking of him? No, probably not, but if I don’t, won’t she feel like I’m not attracted to her anymore? Round and round I go.What with the Ethan-induced madness and the Jess-induced.
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