A woodpecker or twoMade the grade, it is true,But it totally baffled the stork.Till along came a man who presentedA tool that was strangely indented.With a dizzying twirlHe punctured that girl,And thus was the corkscrew invented.There was a young lady of norwayWho hung by her heels in a doorway.She said to her beau,‘Look at me, joe,I think i’ve discovered one more way.’There once was a lady from ardenWho sucked off a man in a garden.He said, ‘my dear flo,Where does all that stuff go?’And she said, ‘(swallow hard)-i beg pardon?’There was an old man of decatur,Took out his red-hot pertater.He tried at her dentBut when his thing bent,He got down on his knees and he ate ‘er.There once was a man from nantucketWhose prick was so long he could suck it.He said, with a grin,As he wiped off his chin,‘If my ear were a cunt i could fuck it.’There was a young girl, very sweet,Who thought sailors’ meat quite a treat.When she sat on their lap,She unbuttoned their flap,And always had plenty to. "I only put this on because I don't often get a chance to wear it. But make sure you dress up to wine and dine Julie tomorrow; it is a Friday night first date after all!"With Vee looking so amazing, I enjoyed our stroll into town. We held hands all the way, and she attracted more than a few glances.We found the jazz club, I paid our admission, and we went downstairs to find ourselves in a noisy room full of tables in alcoves.We got our drinks at the bar, and found a place where we had a clear view of the piano, reasoning that it probably meant we'd get a good view of the band when they appeared.We chatted for a while, and I tried very hard to talk to and about Vee, rather than about Julie or Jeff - after all this was Vee's night out with me!I still wasn't used to being out in public with such a good-looking girl, and got a little tongue-tied on occasion, until Vee put me at my ease by saying that having seduced me already, it was such a relief for her not to be subjected to chat-up.
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