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Three weeks every month, makes forty-two. Times twelve makes five hundred and four a year. This past year, you have stolen more than five hundred orgasms from me. Five hundred cries of ecstasy. Five hundred moments in which I would have gazed upon my wife’s face and seen the blush and the tears of climax on her cheeks.”Ada locked her jaw to hold back choleric words. It was not like you volunteered to join me. You ignored me. You actively shunned me, leaving me alone in your comfortable, boring mansion with nothing to do except-“How many strikes do you think you deserve for each theft?”“Strikes?” Ada sat up straighter. “You mean-““I will discipline you, Ada, and I will get my satisfaction.” He said it with such conviction it was like a biblical commandment. “I will put my hand to your buttocks, your thighs, your weeping cunt and whichever other body part I wish, and I will hurt you until you cry and pay me for my loss with your tears.”She had never heard words that obscene. The odd. The last time I tried to pick someone up, the Brady Bunch was still on television. In fact, I believed the plan would quickly fail because Pamela wouldn’t be interested in a graying old man with a paunch. I was wrong. I established a place at the bar, then bought all three of them a drink. I also bought a beer for myself. When the drinks were delivered, I gave a little wave and worked my way to their table. “Care for a dance?” I asked politely. I’d decided that if Pamela truly went for older men, then my best shot was to be polite but charming. “No, thanks,” Pamela said. Sue jumped up. “I will though,” she said, then took my arm. I danced with her and then Diane and then Sue again. I bought another round of drinks after that and was invited to sit at their table. Sue was orchestrating things nicely, and before long, Pamela agreed to dance. We danced to a rock tune. Then, the band switched to a slow number. I took her in my arms as if it were the natural thing to do. She dragged.
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