He was some 8-9 years elder to her. This statement was like a shock to me as I never expected her to utter those words. I understood the hidden meaning behind this.I took it very calmly as I knew a few wrong steps and I will be screwed. I told her that there are ways to do it by yourself, which she did not understand at all. I told her I will show it to her. After almost 5 years I opened the porn website for 3GP videos as that was the only one that the particular net connection would have supported.I opened up a video of a girl playing with herself, and she used my headphones and saw the whole movie. She was aroused and I could feel that from her breathing. After that i showed her one more porn movie that include all the hard core actions. She asked me if all these things are possible and do girls do all these stuffs, and especially do Indian girls do all these stuff. I told her that not all indian girls do such stuffs, especially the stuffs like doggy style, and riding on top and. It lands near a pond and it is beautiful.I look into the clear water and see my soul reflected and it is beautiful.I now realise although hidden from me it has always shown through my thoughtsand now I am at peace with my thoughts and actions.Though I don't know how to show it to those around who only see a shell of meI long to become that which I saw in that pond, not only insidebut also on the outside.I look upon these clothes and they can't convey the brightness of my soulI hear my voice after so long and it doesn't sound as it should be,And so I will change.After so long the most indestructible mask,the steel bars of my prison have been broken open,after many years, the news of my grandmother's death reaches my heart,the loss of my high school friends reaches my heart,the loneliness of years reaches my heart,the worry over loosing my elderly parents reaches my heart,the sadness of years waiting, inaction and waste reaches my heart.Tears well up quickly and overflow, leaving me.
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