With a shake of her head, Mary flipped her long auburn hair back over her shoulder. "Well, I'll not feel sorry for myself. I'll just have to make the best of it."Examining her soiled hanky, a grimace formed on Mary's face. She grabbed up the water bucket and filled it from the pool of spring water. Dipping her handkerchief into the cool, clear water and rinsing it clean, she puzzled over other things. As she drifted through the past few days of her trying existence, she had noticed odd occurrences. Little gaps of time, for one. She'd be stirring beans for dinner, or lying under Patrick's weight, and next she knew she was somewhere else, busy at some other chore with no recollection of going from one to the other. Sometimes all of a morning or afternoon would be missing.Wiping at the curve of her neck with the moist hanky, Mary's finely arched eyebrows wrinkled in bewilderment. The voices were much more disturbing. It was only Patrick and herself in this God forsaken canyon, but, she. I used to go there all the time with my father, before he died. Whycan't he be here now?! He would do something to save me! I watch a fiveyear old boy on the seesaw with his father; they laugh and smile and Ithink how similar my father and I must have been, ten years ago. Wedrive past my school, and I see a hundred familiar faces in the yard,playing football, eating, talking. I know many of them must have beentalking about me. Desperately, I stare at them, hoping for just one lastglimpse of my old life.Suddenly, everything becomes real. My body starts to shake and shudderas tears pour from my face. I realise this is the end. In fifteen daystime, I will be a completely different person. I will no longer exist.Not as Christopher, at any rate. I start to lose control of my body,pounding my fists into my legs, wailing and screaming, begging theGender Compliance Officer to please, please let me go.She says nothing.*My mother wrote a letter to our MP to complain about the way we had.
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