.." Me neither doc," said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really good with the kids."An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."Two reasons why it's so hard to solve a redneck murder:1. The DNA all matches.2. There are no dental records.A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"The agent replies, "Just a minute." Thank you!" the blonde says, and hangs up.Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez."How was he killed?" asked one detective."With a golf gun," the other detective replied."A golf gun! What is a golf gun?" I don't know. But it sure made a hole in Juan."Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion.'Joe: 'Really?'Moe:. That's when her mom showed up in a bikini that left very little to the imagination. For a woman who was closer to fifty than forty, she had kept herself in great shape. Her belly had a little pad of extra flesh, but on her it looked sexy. The tits trying to pop out of the tiny top of that provocative suit must have been at least 38Ds. When she bent over to say hello, they almost fell into my lap, which got me going, but good. I thought to myself that mom would have been a better choice than her daughter when it came to getting me off on my honeymoon. After chatting with her for nearly an hour I was not only convinced, I was ready to tell my wife to take a hike. My new mother-in-law insisted in being called by the name of Roxy or as she liked to say, Roxy the doxy. When she was younger she put out for every serious boyfriend she had, and there were plenty considering how good her body looked today. She made no bones about the fact that by the time she was sixteen, she had done.
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