You know how it will be. I had hoped that I would make Chief Inspector or even Superintendent before I retired, but that isn't going to happen now. The suspension is on my record and no matter if it was justified or not, that will affect my career. I am going now whilst I have some years to offer a prospective employer." He grudgingly agreed with me."This will go to the top. I'll make sure of that." Good of you to say that, John, but you know it won't make any difference."Although my heart wasn't in it, I continued working as if I hadn't resigned. The news went round the Nick very quickly, and my colleagues made the time to see me and commiserate first, then wish me well. Coming off a late shift Bob Parrathwaite invited me for a drink. We went into Jacqui 'R's. It was a weeknight so Jacky wasn't there. Bob was outspoken to say the least."Gascoigne a detective? He couldn't detect the smell of shit." He took a long pull of his Coors. "I can't understand what he was up to. Harry had. Can you do the same?" That's a great idea. I'll put a pen and some paper next to the bed, just in case."Pam stayed up and read in front of the fire. I crawled into bed after showering and, as usual, thought about Lydia. Those last 24 hours with Pam brought back many memories.Sometime, in the early hours, I suddenly awoke. I had another dream, and Lydia was there. I could feel her body next to mine, and it startled me. I turned on the lamp and was shocked to see that Pam was in bed next to me. I gently shook her shoulder.She jumped. "Oh, you scared me." Pam, what are you doing here?" You were having a very bad dream and kept yelling for Lydia. It went on for a while and I thought that maybe, if you could feel me next to you, that you'd think I was her and it'd calm you down. I'm sorry if I upset you." You didn't upset me. I just don't want to take advantage of you. Did we..." I struggled with the words but she helped."Were we intimate? No, of course not. You were the perfect gentlemen.
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