The only bump in the road we hit was when she asked about our return policy. I explained she was welcome to try anything and everything on, but that once I left, I couldn't accept any returns. "New rules," I said. "You can't return lingerie once it's been worn. Sorry." She didn't like that at all, but I kept distracting her with new and fun things from my magic suitcase, and her objection softened.Finally she said, "Now what?"I said nonchalantly, "Now you try it all on." In front of you?" she asked, her eyes wide."Not if you're not comfortable. Don't be silly. Feel free to try them on in the privacy of your bedroom. I'll wait here if you want." I paused. "Of course, I know how these things are supposed to fit, and I do this all day, it's no big deal to me. But whatever you want..."She was uncomfortable, that was clear. She said "Don't be insulted, but, ah, I think I'll try them on in the bedroom. By myself. Can I get you something while you wait?" Sure, a root beer or whatever.. "When it was quiet I went on. "Okay, for those who don't follow the news, I'm Commodore Roger Edelmann. For what it's worth, I'm an American. I think it's common knowledge that Americans are the most aggravating of the Commonwealth peoples to work with." I got some chuckles."Except for maybe the Jamaicans, and a lot of that is because no one can understand what they're saying." A few more chuckles."Are there any Jamaicans here?"After a few seconds someone raised a hand and said "Nay, mon, but I lived on de island twelve years." Please get with the AIs and see if they can teach you English. That's all I'm asking." More laughter."Life is hard, mon. Jah, I do dat thing."Dickie leaned over to me again. "I know him. He's as Australian as I am." Ah, thanks. Narked out by a neighbor, or nicked as I guess they would say."It's been pointed out that many of the Aussies have trouble with their diction, too." Much more laughter at this point."Alright, getting back to the point. Us Americans are.
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