.After you have finished the washing up you peel the gloves from your hands and hang them over the taps. You then bend down and pick up the rubbish bag and make a move for the back door.I dart into the bushes as you unlock the door. I watch with my heart racing as you place the rubbish in the outside bin. As you approach the back door the door bell goes. You hurry inside closing the back door behind you. I notice in your haste you forget to lock it. Bingo. A way inside......With me not knowing who was at the front door I wait to see if you have any visitors. I watch as you return to the kitchen a few minutes later and pour yourself a large glass of wine. As you only pour the one its safe for me to assume you are alone. An hour goes by and I watch as the lights downstairs are turned out one by one. A few seconds later the back bedroom light illuminates. About ten minutes later the bedroom light goes out. Now it's a waiting game.I look down at my watch. It’s going on midnight. You must. Neither Paloma nor Lillian were a substitute for Caroline, they were merely two sexually active, athletic, articulate and adorable young women, who enjoyed being pleasured by me, and it goes without saying I wallowed, happy as a pig in muck, in carnal excess with them.Sometimes, as I plunged into their willing bodies, a vision of Caroline, or Annette Blanchard, would appear in place of the female I was galloping.I took these appearances of the two women whom I had truly loved as a sign of their approval, as if they were pleased I had moved on from the depths of despair to be now enjoying the pleasure of the flesh, and life itself.Once, as I was vigorously plugging Paloma, the face of Judith Rothstein appeared. I was greatly surprised to have a vision of the young Jewish girl. Although she was the female responsible for awakening my slumbering libido after the death of my wife, I had no feelings of love for her; affection and gratitude maybe, but not the overpowering love I had for.
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