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So what does that mean? Were you just floating around as free energy in space or something?”“After a fashion, I suppose you could say that. The dimension in which I exist, the one from which I was so rudely and abruptly extracted, isn’t really perceptible in your universe. Where I come from, sentience doesn’t always take physical form. As I said, I don’t know exactly how the old boy managed to snag me, but once captured, I was bound to his will, and his will was that I remain confined to this mirror and do his bidding until I’m specifically released by my current master.” The image leaned forward conspiratorially, and added, “If you would consider doing me that kindness, Merlin, I’d be ever so grateful.”Merlin would need to give that some serious thought ... if this was all real, that is. “I’ll consider it, but I’m not doing anything until I know a lot more about all this. For instance, what good are you?”Smoke looked offended and said, “I beg your pardon! There’s no need to be. There were some failures of course, the most notable being ‘Book Week America’ when at the eleventh hour the national committee rejected Tom’s theme that was ready to go to print based on the theme, ‘When Did You Last Read a Book Dumbo?’ The book week committee chairman was fired and the publishers demanded their payment of $88,000 be refunded. The partners of Tom’s firm agreed reluctantly to refund $10,000 and told the organization to pay better attention when approving a promotional campaign in future. The organization threatened to claim $200,000 in damages but nothing eventuated. The other more damaging fizzle occurred when the directors paid back $372,000 advanced to promote a black condom Tom assured the promoters couldn’t possibly fail and named it the Black Sheik of Sheaths. Ethnic groups lodged complaints about political insensitivity and women went to the media complaining it implied that a black penis was superior to a white, yellow or green one. The media of course had.
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