" Please! Take it." Terrence could see the man was on the verge of hysterics. His eyes darted left and right, the eyes of a cornered animal looking for a small route of escape. "I assure you..." Terrence began. Then he realized nothing he could say would change the way this man thought of him. Michales fell silent. He was tired of appearing to be a monster and worse, he was tired of acting like one. He would leave cash chips hidden for this man, some place, in the seat next to his own perhaps. The argument would just circle around to this bottle and the man's desire for no further trouble if Terrence persisted. Michales waved him off and the man scurried like a mouse back to his bar where he avoided the looks and whispers of the patrons that hadn't fled when then badge made it's grand appearance. He cracked the seal on the new bottle and poured a generous helping of the warm oily liquid, the lip of the bottle clanking on the rim of the glass as his shaking hand poured. Terrence didn't. " I began to say, but Frank and Gina were already nodding their head. I took off my apron and walked out into the fresh air. I took a deep breath and bent at the knee, looking down at the floor. "You got this," I said to myself. "Things are turning around; the kids are happy; you just need to find something that makes you happy; that's all." It was a daily speech I gave myself every day, sometimes three to four times in a single day. I walked to my car and got in. While everything else was getting put together, I felt like I was in a snow globe that someone always shook before the snow could settle. I couldn't stop myself from thinking about how gullible I was, how could I not see the signs? The late nights, he didn't get promoted, no raises — the constant out of town trips. Whenever I said I wasn't in the mood, he never put up an argument. There were signs, and I didn't read them. Now he was living the porn dream, fucking porn stars and making more money than he had when we were.
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