My newest problem was that tonight, I was going to be forced to accept who I was and be fucked by a group of men.I got up later Saturday and did very little. Mom asked how my date had gone with Jackie. How was I to answer that honestly?“It was ok, but I don’t think I will be going out with her again.” What an understatement that was!“But why, she is such a pretty girl?”“I don’t know, we just didn’t hit it off all that well.” I wanted to add, but I’m not a virgin anymore!Early afternoon, I got a text form Johnny with a link that took me to a very long video of Jackie being fucked. I skipped through a lot of it, but there must have been over a dozen different boys that had her during the very long evening. I think she must have showered several times during the evening because her hair would be wet, then dry, then wet again. But the part that made me beat off to it was when she was being driven home and obviously didn’t have a shower before then and as the camera panned down her body,. I feel the sharp point of the blade at my entrance. ?If I penetrate you with this blade, Kathryn, do you realize what could happen? I think you know what will happen if you clench your muscles.??Yes.? i reply weakly. i am trembling uncontrollably, knowing that in my current position, my Master can do whatever he wants with me, that i have deeded my very being and existence to Him. That my life is His to take. i have signed myself over to Him, body and soul, but I wonder: Will He take my life, spill my essence, my gift, so recklessly? my total submission to Him wrestles with my innate will to survive.i now feel the edge of the blade being drawn across the inside of my left thigh, the pain biting into my flesh, making my cry out. i can feel warm wet blood trickling down my leg towards my ankle. i am aware of the tears running down my face, of pain and fear, ashamed that i am so afraid, when i know that i need to trust completely, otherwise i should not be here, in this room. i am also.
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