She had made her toughest decision ever and it had been because she was both sad and afraid. For the first time in years, she was afraid, afraid of herself. She had spent the last five years trying to remove all fear and tonight her self-imposed fearlessness had failed. She could feel tears wanting to run down her cheeks but determining not to cry, she hurried out in the cold weather.Sandra started to ponder on why she was afraid. It had all started that morning. Why had she entered the shower? She had not intended to. She had just planned on taking her morning shower as she usually did. Still a bit worn out from the night before, she had not even noticed that someone was in there. When she had been about to enter it, she had seen Martin. Even though she should have walked away, she had not. Instead, she had been compelled to hug him and thank him for being so understanding about her and Jessica's needs. After that, she was suddenly soaping his body like she and Jessica usually. "Say it again guys, louder," I said."It's all bullshit." they said louder and with more confidence."One more time," I yelled."It's all bullshit," they screamed."You Betcha," I confirmed."Why does she risk it?" I asked in a quieter, calmer voice. "Because she wants one of the following: Either "A," she wants to test you. "B," she's tired of your relationship and she wants to shake it up or get rid of you. Or "C," she's just so caught up in the thrill of fucking someone else behind your back that she loses control."Why do I do it?" I asked. "There are two reasons here. One is because I don't give a flying fuck about her, your marriage or you. I just want the thrill of watching that shit burn. And secondly ... Because I'm an asshole." The thrill of fucking your wife won't keep my attention for long. Realistically, my feelings for your wife are akin to yours for the golf course you play at all the time. Once you know all of the holes you need to play somewhere else. The thrill is gone..
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